“Put your own mask on first before helping those who next to you.” I’ve heard this sentence from flight attendants countless times. As a mother of four, in the beginning, my heart ached every time I heard it, especially when they came over personally to tell it again. Of course, I understood the logic behind it, it makes perfect sense, if I pass out, I won’t be able to help anyone. It took me many years to realize why is it that deeply painful to listen to these announcements. It was because self-care was not a part of my daily life or my way of thinking.
Why is it important to understand that self-care matters?
Many people, including myself, have believed that self-care is a form of negative “selfishness.” Since this word carried a negative connotation for me, I replaced it with “self-love.” When we do something for ourselves, we may be acting selfishly in the sense that we prioritize our own well-being, but we are powered by self-love. In this process, we are not trying to harm others or take something away from them (whether it’s time, opportunities, or attention). Instead, we are giving something to ourselves, which is an essential part of a healthy life.
The four main areas of self-care
The following four categories are inseparable from each other. It’s essential to maintain balance across all four areas because focusing on just one while neglecting the others can disrupt our overall well-being. Self-care is truly effective when we consistently “recharge” and nurture all four areas.
1. Physical health
This is the most widely accepted area of self-care, as society encourages exercise and healthy eating. However, self-care at this level goes beyond “mandatory” workouts or dieting.
— Movement: Not just sports, but any activity that brings joy (e.g., dancing, gardening, horseback riding, walking in nature)
— Nutrition: More than just dieting, it’s about listening to our body’s signals and practicing mindful, healthy eating.
— Rest and sleep: Consciously incorporating recovery into our daily routine.
— Self-healing: Paying attention to our body’s signals and addressing issues on time, even through natural methods (e.g., massage, yoga, energy balance, dietary supplements).
2. Mental health
This area focuses on our mindset, inner world, and mental resilience.
— Self-reflextion: Journaling, answering self-discovery questions, and paying conscious attention to our inner dialogues.
— Learning and growth: Acquiring new knowledge and maintaining curiosity.
— Stress management: Practicing relaxation techniques, breathing exercises and mindfulness techniques.
— Setting boundaries: Knowing when to say no and sticking to it, recognizing mental overload.
3. Spiritual growth
This doesn’t necessarily have to be approached from a religious perspective, rather, the focus is on the inner peace and the search for deeper meaning and understanding.
— Connection with yourself and nature: Spending time in silence and in nature.
— Meditation and mindfulness: Any practice that helps cultivate present-moment awareness (e.g., breath awareness, mantras, visualization).
— Clarifying life purpose and values: Understanding what truly matters to us and what gives our life meaning.
— Practicing gratitude: Journaling and consciously appreciating the small joys of everyday life.
4. Emotional well-being
Experiencing, accepting, and managing emotions are essential parts of self-care.
— Self-acceptance and self-love: Cultivating a positive inner dialogue, acknowledging our needs, and practicing non-judgment.
— Understanding and expressing emotions: Becoming familiar with the names and meanings of emotions helps us articulate what we’re feeling more accurately, making it easier to experience and process them.
— Nurturing relationships: Spending quality time with loved ones and building deeper human connections.
— Joy and relaxation: Incorporating activities into daily life that bring fulfillment and recharge us.
Ezek a megoldások csak példák. Mindenkinek más igényei, prioritásai és problémái vannak. Ami valakinek segít, nem feltétlenül fog működni másnak. Kisérletezz, hogy neked mi segít, és ne aggódj ha ez egyéni.
Self-care often takes a backseat amidst daily tasks, yet it is essential for long-term physical, mental, and emotional well-being. Here are some common obstacles and possible solutions:
1. Lack of time:
Many people feel they don’t have time for themselves due to a busy schedule.
Possible Solutions:
- Start small: Even 5-10 minutes of consciously dedicated time for yourself each day can make a big difference.
- Make self-care a priority by scheduling it in your calendar, just like a meeting.
- Integrate small habits, such as morning breathing exercises or a short walk after lunch.
2. Guilt:
Many people feel that taking time for themselves is “selfish” because they should prioritize others.
Possible Solutions:
- Remind yourself that self-care is not selfish but a form of replenishment, allowing you to give more to others.
- Remember that when we are well, our environment benefits too.
3. Habits and routines
If we’ve been used to putting ourselves last for years, it can be hard to change overnight.
Possible Solutions:
- Start small: Incorporate just one new habit.
- Focus on the benefits of change to make it easier to adjust.
4. External expectations and social pressure
Society often expects productivity and constant activity, viewing time spent on ourselves as a “luxury.”
Possible Solutions:
- Learn to say no and stick to it.
- Acknowledge your own needs as equally important.
- Surround yourself with people who support self-care.
It is important to keep in in mind that self-care doesn’t have to be complicated or time-consuming. Even small changes can positively impact our quality of life and the environment around us. When we consciously pay attention to all four areas, physical, mental, spiritual, and emotional well-being, we can live a more balanced, energetic, and happy life. There is no “perfect moment” to start. Right here and right now, as you read these lines, you’ve already taken a step toward self-care. By consciously focusing on ourselves every day, we can maintain the balance of our physical, mental, and emotional well-being.
References:
https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC8488814
https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S2666558122000057
